Utter idiocy

There's a fine line between epicness and idiocy. I have a tendency to err on the wrong side. It's just so hard not to want to do everything. Rationally I know that I can't do everything. But it doesn't stop me from wishing I could. I wasted a lot of my youth studying too much and being invisible and staying too long in the wrong places out of fear. I got lucky and somehow everything worked out extraordinarily well for me, but I'm determined not to make the same mistakes again.

Saturday is my favorite day of the week. Because two of my most favorite things are running for hours and talking to people. And Saturday is the day I get to do both at the same time. It doesn't matter if it's zero degrees or the snow is knee deep and it's really more like riking (run-hiking, not to be confused with Riker-ing). Of course I'd prefer the sunshine and warmth but whatever the weather, if I have legs to run on and friends to joke around with, it's a good day. Yesterday morning it took us 3 hours to run 10 miles. The snow was so deep in some sections of the trail that we looked more like staggering drunks than runners. But it was a whole 20 degrees out, the sun was shining and I loved it. Some of the group went on to do more miles and I was really tempted to join them. If there weren't people depending on me for a ride back to their cars at the start, I would have kept going, no matter how ill-advised it was. This morning we were back at it again for 5 miles on the Mess The Dress course to celebrate TrailsRoc's 3rd birthday. And all I could think was how much better my days are for knowing all these amazing people.

It was an awesome but tiring week. My mileage hasn't been very high but with the strength training, yoga, hills and snow, it feels like more. I hope this means that I am working hard and getting stronger, not that I'm trying to take on too much. I'm trying to be smart about it but it's just so freaking hard. I really want to run Mind The Ducks. But I won't. Because it's utter idiocy and I know I'm not ready for something like that. Still, it's been in the back of my mind for a couple of years and I'd love to attempt it someday. Hopefully next year. That means I have to build the foundation this year. Lots of training, less races, far better nutrition (that one has always been my Achilles heel). And most importantly, learning to listen to my body and actually rest when I need to. If I can do that, I just might become a perpetual motion machine.

But either way, epicness or idiocy, I'm going to enjoy the ride.

Lyric of the moment: "I am young and I'm alive. I want to talk about things. I am young and I own my life. I need to talk about it...I'm right on track but this state is frail. You slip out and derail. I do my dance in the round...I wanna do it right this time..."