Reminders

I love this post, especially the following parts:

"Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot. Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth. And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends."

and

"If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason."

Somehow the right words always find me at the right time. I need reminders to slow down, relax, enjoy these moments instead of rushing off to the next. There are so many things I want to do, but I can't worry about them all at once. I will do what I can with the time that I have.

I feel a little stuck because I don't want to spend my time waiting around for someone or something to happen. But I don't want to do everything alone. Half the fun of any adventure is sharing it with someone.

I find things to do to keep myself busy, but then I go home alone to my house where everything is quiet and perfectly in order. Which is how I like it. Except that I hate it. The stove is clean, but it's because no one uses it. The bed is made, but only because there's no one still in it when I get up. I miss the chaos of other people.

There is a lesson in here somewhere. I need to remember how this feels so that the next time I live with someone I don't take it for granted. Like when you first wake up next to someone and think "wow, I'm so lucky" but then over time it becomes "ugh, he's snoring again." I want to wake up happy and energized and grateful for every day. This may require some kind of "today is going to be awesome" dance. Or pillow chocolate, like in fancy hotels.

I don't think I want a conventional life, but it can be lonely when most people seem to be headed one way and I'm off floating in the wind somewhere else.

Lyric of the moment: "If there was a better way to go then it would find me. I can't help it, the road just rolls out behind me. Be kind to me, or treat me mean. I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine..." (because I really hope it's true)